We cannot build emotional resilience without first and foremost understanding the role of emotions. The Excellence Program has a Focus Sheet on learning the language of the unconscious and how to understand what our emotions are communicating. Here’s a summary of some of the things it explains:
A metaphor I often use when explaining emotions is that of a 3-year-old child bidding for her mother’s attention by saying “Mummy!” If the Mum continues to be distracted with other things and ignores her, what do you think will happen? The child will keep calling, won’t she? “Mummy… Mummy… Mummy.”
Until finally the Mum acknowledges her and says, “Yes, darling. What would you like to share?” And even if she’s busy, she could say, “Sweetheart, I hear you, I’m just in the middle of something at the moment. Can you please wait for a few minutes?” It’s very similar with our emotions.
When we see our emotions as feedback from the Unconscious, we have a useful framework about how to interpret them. Then, resilience emerges organically, as it’s a bi-product of empowered meaning-making about the world we inhabit.