Tell a Good Story and You will Create a Great Reality
By: Deb Maes
October 30, 2013
As a child, I sat alone, on a bench, under a tree for my entire primary school years, rejected, bullied and sad.
This is the EVENT as I recall it. Although the experience of the event is true and real for me, it may not be fully accurate. This is my story about the event.
Strange as it may sound, we make-up everything we experience. It is an absolute impossibility to experience anything in the world exactly as it is. Our brains are constantly interpreting and organising the information that is coming in through our sensors. The study of illusions has proven the brain’s perceptual system is active in making meaning. This is essential so we can experience the world as stable, even though we are receiving information that is incomplete or corrupted. Just think what your brain can do when you are listening on the phone with poor reception. You’ll automatically fill in the gaps (although sometimes you get it wrong).
So what’s the problem? No problem except when we believe the stories we tell ourselves are reality. What’s even more of a problem at times is the story we tell about the story.
Although this was truly a sad experience in my life, what really made me suffer was the story I told about the story, “I’m different. No one likes me. I have no friends”. I thought of myself as a freak and I came to believe that I couldn’t connect with people or make friends.
This was very disabling for me for many, many years, until I changed the story. I now say, “as a result of sitting alone, I became good at observing people and this has enabled me to become a thoughtful and effective communicator”.
Changing the story about the story is not the same as viewing everything positively. The truth is it was a sad and painful phase in my life. The event remains the story as I experienced it… I was alone and rejected as a child. What changes is the story I tell about it and the meaning I make of that.
Using actor’s terms… it’s these stories about the stories that defines our character, creates the sub-text of our life and informs the scripts we write and how we perform the roles in our life. Remind you of Shakespeare’s words? …
“All the World’s a Stage, and all the men and women merely players”.
This last weekend, we had a lot of fun in our ‘Power of Story’ Transformation Program, unravelling the story from the event and learning how to script new parts that let us tell a great story, which is much more the truth of who we really are. A special thanks to all the participants who told and changed their stories, and shared the journey home to self. Mwah
We’ll have more information on the website soon, but you may email if you’d like to know more about the program. Till then, listen to your stories and tell a good one ????